Wailing.

I sit here in a cloud, listening to the world
outside my cracked window.
What's that?
screeching brakes.
yeah, i relate to you too.
being forced to stop when you don't want to.
being forced to change.
you wanna just go and go...
but you can't...
so the brakes. they scream
like my heart screams in my chest.
unlike the bus with the squeaking brakes
I don't have someone to tell me what to do.
If I act like a machine will someone treat me like a machine?
If I pretend like what you say and do to me doesn't matter,
dear god,
will you treat me like I don't matter.
And stop letting me think this is fake.
that this is all a lie.
What's this I hear now?
laughter.
what a novel idea.
laughing, isn't it?
i hope that maybe one day I will know
laughter again.
Because here, here in this cloud,
we don't laugh.
we are serious, and we don't know fun
or whimsical frivolity.
we know work.
we know brutality.
and sensitivity eludes us.
can I have my laughter back?
oh but wait,
something new from the cracked window,
A siren?
where is it going?
it's coming closer.
It's coming for me?
Where am I?
How did I get here....
Oh... that's right.
you threw me down here with your words.
your lack of consideration.
and your lack of what i thought was abundant and
never-ending, blissful, jubilant, uninhibited love. for me.
but i guess i let my mind get away from me.
because here i am.
fallen through my cloud onto the cold hard ground.
waiting for you
while the sirens wail and wail
around my head.
you're not coming are you?
i should've known you wouldn't.
I'm too much for you.
I'm too much for anyone.
Isn't that what everyone's said?
Thanks for proving them right.
oh...
and that piece of my heart that you took.
keep it.
I won't need it where I'm going.